Raise your hand if you know who Die fokken Antwoord is! As some of you may know, I've been obsessed with this "band" for about a month now. I don't even know what it is!! Is it Yo-Landi Vi$$er's 12 year-old-alien-boy-with-double-D-boobies sex appeal? Ninja's sweet prison tattoos that say things like "a woman is more dangerous than a loaded pistol"? DJ Hi-Tek's ever-changing looks and phat beatz? This video?? They're amazing!
Over the years, I've had many obsessions. Examples include but are not limited to: R.E.M., the Monkees, Michael Jackson, Saturday Night Live, Adam Sandler, and Gene Wilder. It's been at least 3 years since I've had a genuine obsession. For some reason, Die Antwoord caught my attention when I saw a clip of them performing "I Fink U Freeky" on Letterman. At first, they scared the shit out of me and I thought they sucked balls. Then, I investigated and found out that Watkin Tudor Jones aka Ninja is the greatest performance artist I've heard of since Salvador Dali. This dude is committed. He's had a handful of alter-egos over the years, but Ninja is by far the most controversial. He had a character named Max Normal who rapped in a suit too small for him and a tie. He was badass.
Committment: getting a tattoo that says "what are you looking at?" in Afrikaans on your wiener. Since I can't post a picture of that, here's this. (but you can google image it if you want)
They're committed and holy mother of God are they filthy. I'm embarrassed to play their music too loudly in my apartment since lyrics like "DJ Hi-Tek will fuck you in the ass" and "I couldn't help staring at those nice tits/chillin just below them big, fat blow-job lips" aren't very lady-like. I wear a cardigan, for God's sake. Also, they sound like any other amateur white rave/rap group until you actually listen to their weird Afrikaans lyrics.
Maybe that's why I love them so much. Their weird Afrikaans accents are hypnotic. It's like a Dutch chick and an Australian dude had sex and nine months later, a bastard came out and they named it Afrikaans and left it in Johannesburg to (d)evolve into... DIE FOKKEN ANTWOORD!
I think my obsession with them is coming to an end. I can sense another one coming, though, and I think it's name is Roky Erickson.
This dude was the "godfather of psychedlic rock" in the 60s, took too many hallucinogenic drugs which aggravated his schizophrenia, was an unmedicated recluse for years and when he finally returned to music, he only sang about demons, lucifer, ghost babies and aliens. At one point, he actually thought he *was* an alien. But that's for another blomblog.
Until then - I'm burning, I'm burning, I'm burning for you.
Holy macaroni! I started a website!
I decided to start this website because I just got back from Los Angeles and everyone out there has a web presence. Even Jorge, the guy I found sleeping in an alley outside of the Los Angeles "Church" of Scientology - www.jorgethebum.com.
Wow! He's even on twitter: www.twitter.com/jorgethebum. He has more followers than me! Meeting him really motivated me to get on the ball and create a name for myself on the interwebs. Thankfully, no one had taken www.carolynblomberg.com. I was really worried about that.
I'm excited to keep you all updated with my super exciting life! I'll regale you with synopses of the movies I watch on Netflix *and* Hulu!
Here's some Twitter for your Tweeting Pleasure: